Fearfully & Wonderfully Made

Have you ever had a friend that was not excited about your success? This friend is fine when you are on the same level, but the moment you get a little bit ahead there becomes tension? Do you notice everyone else clapping but them? Maybe it was a big promotion or a major raise. Perhaps it was a brag-worthy new job maybe you launched an awesome side hustle, and this person is just not as excited for you as everyone else. Seriously what is up with that? We commonly use the phrase crabs in a barrel, but it is known as crab mentality or crab theory. Crab mentality is a thought process that says, “If I can’t have it, neither can you”. When you put live crabs in a barrel it has been found that it is very easy for one crab to escape, but that crabs’ efforts are undermined by others which leads to the crab’s overall demise collectively.  Human behavior in certain ways can mimic the crab mentality; in group settings, members of a group will (sometimes) attempt to diminish the progress of any me

  Have you ever been in a room full of people celebrating a special occasion, and you just weren’t feeling it? You felt like the party, and the celebration was going on around you, but you could not muster the strength to be in the same happy mood as others. This past Sunday was Mother’s Day, which is a day to be celebrated and is celebrated by many. Honoring the strength of motherhood and celebrating mothers and mother-like figures in your life. I could not help but think about those who may feel disconnected from the Mother’s Day festivities, those that are sitting in a room with a celebration going on around them and simply do not feel like celebrating.  Maybe you lost your mother, maybe your child passed away and you are grieving, maybe you are longing to be a mother and for whatever medical condition you are not able to be, maybe you have carried and have lost your child to miscarriage or stillbirth, maybe the relationship you have with your mother, or your child has with you is s

Have you ever been in a place where you feel like you have been pulled every which way? Everyone connected to you just needs something; you look at your phone there’s a text “hey can you do me a favor?”, answer your phone “I need help”, reading your email “can you meet this deadline for this special project?” from home to work; and everything in between is pulling you in different directions. It is so easy to say yes, I understand you don’t want to let anyone down, or offend anyone so you give a yes as an autopiloted response. I am going to be transparent with you all personally I have been that person that will run myself into the ground going out of my way to do someone a favor. I used to think that I was just and nice person, a giver and that is true I am a nice person I am a giver but I was also a people pleaser. I  was always trying to be someone's point guard, quarterback, or superhero.  People-pleasing is associated with a personality trait known as sociotropy, yes y’all t

Wow, It has been a while since I last posted. I sent my last post out and closed my browser window and I have not stepped back to this space since Oct 2019. It has been 30 months, 941 days, and 134 weeks. That is a long time, and before that, I had taken a break for a long while. Today I woke up and decided I am back. So much has happened in the time since I last posted love, loss, births, burials, a pandemic, insurrection, inflation, victories, and defeats. I was quiet for a season or two (or more let’s just be honest), but in understanding, and processing, I believe that maybe it was just my season to be quiet, and guess what THAT’S OK.   The word of God reads in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (ESV) For everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven:  a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;  a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;  a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a

Yall I FELL OFF! When I say I fell off I fell offffffff! It has seriously been since 2017 since I wrote in my blog *insert shocked face*. So much has happened between now and then I don't even know where to start. I didn't just fall off from writing I fell off from myself! I know yall are saying HOW SWAY??? I know it is so hard to believe I take such pretty pictures, and my son King Baby (yes I refer to my son as King Baby) is so very scrumptious, I look so happy how I did fall off???? I became Perfunctory (yes I just hit yall with an SAT prep word) It means to perform merely as a routine duty, hasty, superficial. I was just going through the motions, smiling for the camera, trying not to rock the boat. When I reflect on different situations over the past few years I am embarrassed; there were times when I should have spoke up yet stayed quiet, there were times when I should have left but didn't, there were times when I went left and should have went right. I take full

So the other day my friend Jess and I went grocery shopping together for the first time (I'm sure Jess is thinking there is also a last hahaha) also it was my first time shopping at that particular grocery store. So unbeknownst to Jess, I decided that I did not want a cart and that we would just share the one she grabbed; this was a major lapse in judgement on my part because I knew how long both of our grocery lists were. I had never been to that particular grocery store so Jess decided to give me a tour while we were grocery shopping just showing me the lay of the land. Well while I am mentally comparing prices of some random canned goods that are on my grocery list I look up to see that Jess had wandered off; she didn't go too far though she was just one aisle over. So when I get to the aisle I immediately notice the random array of different brands all piled on shelves with no order what so ever it's like someone just threw it all there. So Jess is looking through the