Fearfully & Wonderfully Made

Do not neglect to extend hospitality to strangers [especially among the family of believers—being friendly, cordial, and gracious, sharing the comforts of your home and doing your part generously], for by this some have entertained angels without knowing it. Hebrews 13:2  Amplified Bible I do not usually come out the gate with a scripture, people who know me know I am not they type to cram the bible down anyone's throat that's just not me I am not that girl. I am a millennial believer trying to navigate through the old school church, and new school.    But today Hebrews 13:2 was on my heart.... So lets talk about it.  In todays day and age it is so easy to be offended, and to take offense. With social media and all of Al Gore's internet at our finger tips it is so easy to create a bias, finish a conversation in our heads that was never had, and perceive a tone with out even hearing the sound of someone's voice.  So easily we judge a person with out really u...

Have you ever had a friend that was not excited about your success? This friend is fine when you are on the same level, but the moment you get a little bit ahead there becomes tension? Do you notice everyone else clapping but them? Maybe it was a big promotion or a major raise. Perhaps it was a brag-worthy new job maybe you launched an awesome side hustle, and this person is just not as excited for you as everyone else. Seriously what is up with that? We commonly use the phrase crabs in a barrel, but it is known as crab mentality or crab theory. Crab mentality is a thought process that says, “If I can’t have it, neither can you”. When you put live crabs in a barrel it has been found that it is very easy for one crab to escape, but that crabs’ efforts are undermined by others which leads to the crab’s overall demise collectively.  Human behavior in certain ways can mimic the crab mentality; in group settings, members of a group will (sometimes) attempt to diminish the progress of an...

  Have you ever been in a room full of people celebrating a special occasion, and you just weren’t feeling it? You felt like the party, and the celebration was going on around you, but you could not muster the strength to be in the same happy mood as others. This past Sunday was Mother’s Day, which is a day to be celebrated and is celebrated by many. Honoring the strength of motherhood and celebrating mothers and mother-like figures in your life. I could not help but think about those who may feel disconnected from the Mother’s Day festivities, those that are sitting in a room with a celebration going on around them and simply do not feel like celebrating.  Maybe you lost your mother, maybe your child passed away and you are grieving, maybe you are longing to be a mother and for whatever medical condition you are not able to be, maybe you have carried and have lost your child to miscarriage or stillbirth, maybe the relationship you have with your mother, or your child has with...

Have you ever been in a place where you feel like you have been pulled every which way? Everyone connected to you just needs something; you look at your phone there’s a text “hey can you do me a favor?”, answer your phone “I need help”, reading your email “can you meet this deadline for this special project?” from home to work; and everything in between is pulling you in different directions. It is so easy to say yes, I understand you don’t want to let anyone down, or offend anyone so you give a yes as an autopiloted response. I am going to be transparent with you all personally I have been that person that will run myself into the ground going out of my way to do someone a favor. I used to think that I was just and nice person, a giver and that is true I am a nice person I am a giver but I was also a people pleaser. I  was always trying to be someone's point guard, quarterback, or superhero.  People-pleasing is associated with a personality trait known as sociotropy, yes y’...

Wow, It has been a while since I last posted. I sent my last post out and closed my browser window and I have not stepped back to this space since Oct 2019. It has been 30 months, 941 days, and 134 weeks. That is a long time, and before that, I had taken a break for a long while. Today I woke up and decided I am back. So much has happened in the time since I last posted love, loss, births, burials, a pandemic, insurrection, inflation, victories, and defeats. I was quiet for a season or two (or more let’s just be honest), but in understanding, and processing, I believe that maybe it was just my season to be quiet, and guess what THAT’S OK.   The word of God reads in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (ESV) For everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven:  a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;  a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;  a time to weep, and...

Yall I FELL OFF! When I say I fell off I fell offffffff! It has seriously been since 2017 since I wrote in my blog *insert shocked face*. So much has happened between now and then I don't even know where to start. I didn't just fall off from writing I fell off from myself! I know yall are saying HOW SWAY??? I know it is so hard to believe I take such pretty pictures, and my son King Baby (yes I refer to my son as King Baby) is so very scrumptious, I look so happy how I did fall off???? I became Perfunctory (yes I just hit yall with an SAT prep word) It means to perform merely as a routine duty, hasty, superficial. I was just going through the motions, smiling for the camera, trying not to rock the boat. When I reflect on different situations over the past few years I am embarrassed; there were times when I should have spoke up yet stayed quiet, there were times when I should have left but didn't, there were times when I went left and should have went right. I take full ...

So the other day my friend Jess and I went grocery shopping together for the first time (I'm sure Jess is thinking there is also a last hahaha) also it was my first time shopping at that particular grocery store. So unbeknownst to Jess, I decided that I did not want a cart and that we would just share the one she grabbed; this was a major lapse in judgement on my part because I knew how long both of our grocery lists were. I had never been to that particular grocery store so Jess decided to give me a tour while we were grocery shopping just showing me the lay of the land. Well while I am mentally comparing prices of some random canned goods that are on my grocery list I look up to see that Jess had wandered off; she didn't go too far though she was just one aisle over. So when I get to the aisle I immediately notice the random array of different brands all piled on shelves with no order what so ever it's like someone just threw it all there. So Jess is looking through the ...

Remember in 2009 when Steve Harvey wrote New York Times Best Seller Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man ; the book flew off of shelves. There were preorders, and waitlist everyone had a copy I just had to see what all the buzz was about. The book was a hit women all over the world were singing Steve Harvey's praises for unlocking the code to men.  I was straight out of high school going into college when I read Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man; I was very sheltered growing up I was not allowed to listen to worldly music, I was not allowed to date (not that I had the attention of any boy), I was not allowed to go to sleepovers or play dates, or hang out I mean we never even talked about the birds and the bee's in my house. 18 and fresh out of high school I was grown you could not tell me nothin' I didn't have time for childish little boys anymore I was an adult. I knew nothing about boys, and especially nothing about men so downloading this book I thought would satisfy ...

   As a 90's baby the whole prince and princess storyline I got it down pat. Remember Snow White how the prince woke her up with a mear kiss on the lips, or Cinderella how her missing glass slipper was found and replaced by the handsome prince who sweeps her her off her feet. I as I grew in age I would graduate from channel to channel what started as Dinsey movies and turned into Helga worshiping a shrine of her football headed love on Hey Arnold, to then watching Steve Urkel profess his love to Laura, to  staying up late watching endless marathons of Will chasing all the "hunnies" on Fresh Prince of Bel Air.    Love was looks I was inadvertently programmed from a young age to believe that was what love was.  I mean why else did Helga love Arnold, or Cinderella love Prince Charming?; I never once watched an episode of  Fresh Prince and heard Will Smith saying "Dang I love that girl's intellectual abilities!". Each of the characters I gre...

I Forgive You I forgive you for abandoning me. I forgive you for deciding from day one that men were more important and that you had better things to do. I forgive you for signing those papers and getting on with your life; even though they used and abused you, even broke your jaw I think you made a good call. I forgive you for giving up 3 and keeping 1 I guess 1 was better than none. I forgive you for telling her to get rid of "it", young and dumb you were out there having fun. I forgive you for selling dope, I guess the money it brought in gave you hope that one day you would make it out without a doubt I forgive you.  I forgive you for rejecting me. I forgive you for mistreating me as a child, for making me feel unwanted in my own home. I forgive you for introducing me not as your sibling, but as your mothers adopted child I didn't know labels came in such small sizes. I forgive you for allowing me to be raised by a married single mother, it was her idea to get u...

I can remember it like it was yesterday every day at noon my alarm would go off.   Ring Ring Ring  *hit snooze* Ring Ring Ring *hit snooze* this cycle would continue for the next hour or so. After laying in the bed crying for another hour; I would then reach over and grab my pills. I could not find the strength get out of bed without those pills. I would then stumble around the house like the walking dead; I had notes on my phone to remind me what to do. The notes I had on my phone were not very long either it went something like this 1. brush your teeth, 2. take a shower, 3. go downstairs and try to stay for 30 mins after my list was completed I would take more pills and go back to bed; somedays I never completed the list. Depression is real it is not just an everyday struggle for me it was an every second of the day struggle. I literally felt like the walking dead I would stumble around the house in my pajamas my thoughts were so foggy, I felt so heavy. I had successf...

This Saturday I was supposed to be getting married ... yes please let that sink in. Let's skip the fluff this evening and get right into it; this upcoming Saturday on the twenty-third day of the ninth month of the year of two thousand seventeen I was supposed to be walking down the aisle saying "I Do".  For some odd reason, I have always said my husband will be a Marine. There was just something about those Marine Corpsmen that I fancied God Bless America! I had dated a Marine in the past but this time it seemed like this was the one. I guess you can say I had a type tall, dark and decorated this would be my husband. I did everything I thought was supposed to do we found a place I made a home, I cooked, I cleaned, I tried to always keep myself up; stay sexy, stay beautiful, what could I do to keep him intrigued? was always a thought in the back of my head. I basically manipulated my life into a cookie cutter image of what I found to be perfect. Wow, a guy that loves...

Good morning Internets, I honestly was not going to really post today; but I had to just quickly check in to tell you how good my God is! As you all know I just started my blog this week; I am still shell-shocked. I started this blog as a way to walk out on faith; and with my small voice, it was my mission to let the world know about my big God. Well like my father always does he has shown up and showed out! In starting this blog I did not have a direct audience; I did not even know what I really wanted to talk about, but the Lord has been faithful in giving me the right words to say. In the past few days during my blogging; I have been getting an overwhelming amount of support and for that, I thank each and every one of you who have taken the time to read. Little old me I am just typing away thinking that nobody was listening; I was wrong! In the past 3 days,  I have had people all the way from Germany, the United Kingdom, Australia, Nigeria, the United Arab Emirates, Cana...

Fall is finally here! Hallelujah!!! Bye bye summer I will not miss you at all! I am team over it; I am over the sweltering heat, I am over the humidity, and most of all I am over all those pesky little mosquitos. Fall is here and I feel like moonwalking through a pumpkin patch; someone grab me a pumpkin spice latte (children's temperature please).  With everything I love about fall, I do not like Halloween. Growing up I was never allowed to celebrate Halloween; but I never pitched a fit over it because I was a scaredy cat. I never understood why people wanted to dress up like monsters, creepy dead people and the worst of them all clowns. I have always had a fear of clowns, and the recent revamp of the movie IT has not helped the least bit. Psychology Today describes fear as a vital response to a physical and emotional danger.  Fearof.net compiles a list every year of phobias Americans have; some of the top ranking fears on the website were the fear of flying, ...

Yesterday was such a big step for me; I walked out on faith and started my blog. It maybe minuscule to you; but it is a monumental moment for me. I want to first start this post by saying thank you for all the love, and support to everyone who took the time to read my very first post yesterday. At the end of every post; as I did yesterday I will be signing out as  Daughter of a King. I am not trying to toot my own horn at the least bit but I am royalty ... yep!, you read that correctly little ol' me royalty . I'm sure by this point you are rolling your eyes and saying this chick is crazy! But I tell no tales I am the daughter of a King; I am an heir of God and joint heirs with Christ. Flaws and all God took a chance on this broken hearted girl; he grabbed my hand and made me whole. I have been adopted into the family (Eph 1:5); because I have been born again I am no longer a slave - I am now a son of the Most High, and furthermore a co-heir with Christ (Gal. 4:7).  I'm s...

Wow... This is the one-word that continues to run through my head right now; just wow. I can not believe I am sitting here writing  (typing) this blog right now. I have for a long time toyed around with the idea of starting a blog, and I will expand on why it took me so long in another post on another day. This is just my introduction post ... Hello, internets I am here. The name of my blog Fearfully & Wonderfully Made is derived from my one of my favorite scriptures in the Bible  Psalm 139:14 "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well" .  God made no mistake when creating each and every one of us; I know when we think of this scripture we thing more towards physical stand point. When I think of this scripture I try to think of also the mental standpoint, about the uniqueness of my brain. How my and words are known by my heavenly Father before I even speak them from my mouth. So this blog is to me my wa...